Are they having an affair or not?

I was asked, “Pau, are they having an affair?!” I was surprised and I also got myself thinking, do they really have an affair?

How to tell if they are really having an affair? Actually I believe that if our co-workers are having affairs, if it is not messing with their work and if we are not the HR and we are not being affected it’s none of our business. But naturally, we can’t help but talk about it. They say that a workplace is the number one breeding ground for illicit affairs. I agree with that because you and your co-worker are together for a minimum of eight hours a day, five times a week. Possibly a much longer time that one can spend compared to the time one could have for his or her partner. And in most cases the longer time we spend with someone the much more possibility that we fell for that someone, because certainly you’ll see more of that person, talk with that person, eat with that person etc. etc.

Going back to my question, how to tell if they are having an affair? I’m talking based on personal experiences and observations from all the previous company that I worked for and also my current company. It would all start with suspicions, we feel something different in them, the way they talk with each other, the way they approach each other and even in the way that they look at each other but mind you, your first suspicions would not always be the right pair, in some point you’ll be surprised to found out that you matched the wrong pair. Those having illicit work place affairs would try their very best to conceal their relationship basically because of consequences that they might face if it would come out. They may be charge with administrative cases such as immorality and others. They would be discreet in showing their affection and care for each other. But for an observable eye, no matter how discreet they are, you could still see it. Try to observe the way that they hand an item, try to catch their eyes. The affection, no matter how hard they conceal it, their eyes would always speak of it. Another to look for is the best buddy. They would keep it from everyone but there would always be a secret keeper in the company, the one that would be their accomplice. I have been a secret keeper before and to tell you, it is not an easy job, aside from your conscience always bugging you, you would also feel the burden of the relationship although you’re not the one directly involved with it. Usually this is the person that one may use as reason or alibi. The secret keeper could be his best buddy or her best friend, but don’t limit it to them, it could be anyone, but in most cases it is them. These persons can also be used to transmit messages if communicating is not possible. Another thing is, you could see them in your work place’s unexpected areas at unexpected hours. These are mostly areas where people seldom go. This could be a seldom used conference room, remote work area or even the backyard garden.

Before I really don’t believe in this, but when I saw the real thing, I realized it really exists. In my years of working in companies, I have proved that some of my observations are wrong, but most of the time it is right, some even admit it.

I almost forgot observation may vary if it involves both of your friends or if your feeling is messing with your objectivity. Now I’m really torn in believing in my observations or not. My heart hopes it is not but my mind says it’s the other way around.